8...9...10 ahhhhh, I grunted and dropped the 60lb dumbbell beside me on the floor. I just paused there for a second, bent over on the bench with sweat pouring off my head and splashing down in the floor. My breaths were deep and fast and I was exhausted from the intense workout I had just completed. Now upright and sitting on the bench I thought to myself, this is it, I have broken down the wall that has stopped me so many times before and I am now in control. The past month I have battled like I never had before in my life and now it is over. I am the winner, and I am again in control of my body and let me tell you its feels great.
A month earlier I stared up at the ceiling as the light reflected off the Puget sound and through my blinds that were open. It was 1:00 p.m. and I had been laying like this for over 2 hours. In that one fateful moment I had realized that my life was circling the drain.
The dream condo I had once bought with my lovely girlfriend was 2 months from foreclosure. The lovely girlfriend? she was gone too. The six figure bank account was now 2 digits oh and my income from real estate was non existent as well. The Excrement had hit the fan to say the least and to say I was down and out would be an understatement. At my heaviest weight of my life I was also in the most depressing part of my life. 331 lbs was what the scale read and I was shocked and embarrassed.
Sometimes you need a wake up call to pull you out of a rut that you are in. This was more than a wake up call, it was more like waking up to one of your frat buddies pouring ice cold water on your special place. As I layed there paralyzed by fear, resentment and anger I knew there were two options and two paths I could take. Give up and let go, or battle like hell back to the top. Luckily I choose the later.
This morning I stripped down took a few deep breaths and hopped on the scale for the moment of truth. I knew it's be close, maybe tomorrow I thought. 3 seconds later and unfamiliar number popped up starting with a 2. That 2 was all I needed to see, I let out a loud extravagant grunt, batted my chest and threw a fist pump of Tiger-Like proportions. I had lost 32 lbs and more importantly broke the 300 lb barrier that had been haunting me for over 2 years.
While this is only the start of my journey, this is what keeps me going. I seem to be finding "new-old" outfits everyday from my lighter days and this keeps me excited to keep hitting the gym on a daily basis. In celebration of this feat I'm taking a 2 day break and recuperation, even eating a little bad before getting back on the wagon so I can keep my sanity. I'm not there yet, but I know now that I will be. 299.7 lbs and its falling everyday. While the rest of my life is a work in progress I can tell it is all turning around. Bittersweet from anyone else's prospective yes, but it sure feels sweet from mine today.
More soon...
No comments:
Post a Comment